Why a Randi?


written by Shreya at in category Thoughts with 28 Comments


Why a Randi?

‘The only difference between rape in brothels and society is that in brothels they get paid for it.’

Since long time I was struggling to find a topic for my blog. Little lost in the fanciness of this world, I did not want to write on the usual topics, the politics, the stars or the wars. I realized that how easy it is for anyone of us to call a girl  Randi, hoe or a slut, because we judge, we make our own perspective. Because we have been raised with the views that a girl having a boyfriend is characterless, a girl talking to guys is slut. We think that we can call any girl or your own daughter Randi and it is not a big deal.

Okay, so!

Let’s talk about prostitutes. They are Homo sapiens just like all of us who charge money in exchange of the service they offer. They provide this service in exchange of their body, just like any other job. The slang for prostitutes is slut, whore, hooker, tramp, and Randi. So how we distinguish between a slut and prostitutes is that slut does it for fun and prostitutes as services. Either way, woman gain something out of sex. However, prostitutes are discriminated against because they supply the goods to assuage an ever-present demand. Now, this does not condone the destitution or humiliation they suffer, so we shall not get into debates about the problems related to prostitution, like human trafficking, abuse, and poor living conditions.

We use the word Randi for the people we truly want to insult in the worst way possible because, somewhere a prostitute becomes even more lowly if she belongs to a "lower," non-English speaking socioeconomic demographic.

Why do we do this? Why do we have to body shame or insult any woman for that matter? Calling a woman a slut, whore, or Randi, in reality, has less to do with sex and more to do with shaming her for being liberated and promiscuous. It is about shaming her for acting like a man. It is not about sex, but about the way she has it. We have all been told that it is not okay to call each other sluts and whores. And we have all definitely been conditioned to never be seen in the vicinity of someone who might qualify as a Randi according to some. But most of us do not understand why this is the case. 

Many of us think calling a girl slut is bad because we are indirectly calling a prostitute. But if we have so many issues regarding the practice of prostitution as it is about selling sex, then the buy should be equally discriminated for the consumption of the service. Aside from the fact that there is nothing wrong with being a prostitute--if one practices that profession in a safe environment, out of their own free will--this is about a larger polarity. This is about the angel-whore dichotomy, and about the woman who is free enough to embrace her randipan. It is about shaming this free woman for her sexuality, and for painting the very existence of female sexuality as disgraceful. A woman becomes a randi when she expresses the same sexual desire or power that a man does. A man is a stud for doing the same thing which makes a woman a slut. 

And why is that?

Because the definition of the ideal woman is constructed by the patriarchal society. This structure is made by defining how a man and woman should behave in certain manner

 

Why?

Because the definition of an ideal woman is constructed by patriarchy to be the exact opposite. A woman in an angel until is a virgin before marriage and after marriages only consummate to have children. A professional prostitute is half an angel, then, if you think about it from the definition patriarchy gives, because all she does is provide release for men. 

But the other words are used for the woman who has the power to take her desires in their own hand and they do not wish to follow the norms of the society. Because the sexual desires of a woman is something that affects the image of an ideal woman in the eyes of the society. Patriarchy was made to control the woman or with that matter anyone. We are asked to sit in certain way, behave in certain manner, live only certain way of life. This helps control people, especially women, and shaming people is the surest way to bend them into submission. Slut-shaming, and randi-shaming, works even better. It not only shames a woman into believing it is an affliction to feel desire, but it also makes her feel like she is lowly for it. It dehumanizes a woman in her own eyes, because of the way we are all conditioned to perceive prostitution.

It is never going to be okay for you to go around calling us sluts with the intent of shaming us. So, before shaming someone thus, please understand that you are blasting them for choosing exactly what to do with their own bodies. Understand that you have no right to have that opinion. Understand that sluttiness is a positive attribute which actually empowers women, and allows them the freedom to not be used. Understand that your narrow-mindedness has caused you to turn the person you term a randi into a lesser being in your head, not her behaviour or experience. Finally, understand that we will not feel ashamed because you are messed up in the head.

 

BE THE CHANGE TO SEE THE CHANGE.

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Comment by Hafiz Latif

There is no alternative to education. Before we could educate internet got added, the system of education has changed in the west, we are still struggling with basics. Our political will is poor for drastic changes. Mass movement for education and changing our political system and base will only save us. There is nothing unrelated in our lives from birth to death to climate change. May intellectual renaissance dawn on us.

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Reply by Shreya

Rightly said sir. we are making our lives miserable in our pwn ways.

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Comment by Manthan Sawarkar

Mentality matters a lot. Declamatory yet articulate article. I look forward to reading your next informative work. Thank you and keep these good articles coming.

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Reply by Shreya

thank you so much manthan. and yes it is the mentaliy that matters.

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Comment by Ajay Bajpai

Shreya undoubtedly u touched the issue on which very few writers dare to write.i think the attitude the issues matters.i appreciate ur work.

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Reply by Shreya

Yes sir The pen is always mighter than the sword Till we don't dare, we won't be able to fight our mentality.

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sir, thank you so much for such wonderful words regarding the website and the article. 

i will continue writing the articles in same manner and make my readers happy.

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